Ask Elle: Crushed

Elle gives advice to a student worried about how to get over an unrequited crush

Elle is MCHS’s advice columnist. Email her at [email protected].

Elle Smith, Advice Columnist

Dear Elle: So, I’m a lesbian. I don’t hide it, but I also don’t make it my mission to announce it. At the moment as I write this I am chilling in a car with the most beautiful woman in the world. She’s a force to be reckoned with, and she is filled with passion it makes me stop in awe. I want to hold her hand and learn everything about her. I like her so much, but I am pretty sure that she’s straight. Can I get advice on how to get over her?

Sincerely, You Know Who



Hey, I want you to know that this is really, really tough. We’ve all been there, no matter your sexual orientation. We all take the fall and end up liking someone who doesn’t—or can’t—like us back. I will tell you that getting over someone is nowhere near easy. In fact, it is one of the hardest things that a person can do.

The truth is this is something that you will have to work towards over time. I believe that the first step for you is to get some closure. One thing that I do when I need closure is writing letters. You could try this: write a letter as if you are writing it to her explaining all of your feelings, being as descriptive as you want, and get it on paper. Write out the entire situation, then take the letter and keep it somewhere safe, or get rid of it. This is just a suggestion, but it may help provide that much-needed closure and move things along a bit faster.

I promise this will get easier with time and that you will get through it. It sounds cliche, but the truth is as you keep your options open you never know who may wander along. 


Need advice on school, work, love, life, or anything else that’s weighing you down? Email Elle at [email protected], and she may respond to your letter in the online or print edition of The McHenry Messenger.